As part of our series of articles on Children's Mental Health week, we will be sharing perspectives from several of our practitioners. Today we have Andrea Lines sharing her insights into children's mental health.

"I have my own journey with mental health as a child. Back then mental health wasn't talked about as much. Most people were told just to get on with it or hid their symptoms or their feelings from adults. For me, it escalated into extreme social anxiety as a teenager which lasted for a couple of years. Almost no one would know that this was the case for me. The thought of leaving the house and stepping outside onto the street filled my body with extreme anxiety. I would shake, tremble and have extreme nausea. I learned how to put on a brave face and walk in a certain way so no one would know. In my later teen years, I joined a massive corporation and was thrown into the spotlight very quickly. It was during this time that I learned how to manage my emotions and my feelings and overcome extreme social anxiety. Over the years coming, I presented worldwide and ran training and recruitment programs. I would speak in front of hundreds of people and in time, I stopped worrying about stepping in front of the public. Going onto the street no longer filled me with any sense of fear. It did, however, lead me to work within the field of supporting mental health and mindfulness.

My own children have journeyed with various mental health issues that have needed support over the years. As a parent, it quickly became apparent, that although mental health was more readily talked about, there were still not enough resources or information. Support was still lacking for youth and parents. Even with a background in behavioural training, it could often feel lonely during times of family stress. Almost all parents and families around seemed to put a brave front on or hide any other family stressors going on in their lives. I soon became familiar with resources in the area and started to share this with families and parents. It is when this door was opened that more and more people began to talk about what they were journeying with, with their own children and their family. Mental health in families starts with the mental wellness of the parents. If we are not taking care of our mental wellness and avoiding overwhelm, then we are more susceptible to unhealthy coping strategies. It can be difficult to respond to our children in healthy ways. It is also vital that as parents we try to mirror self-care, vulnerability, emotional and mental strategies and navigating life.

I started to run parent and youth mental wellness sessions in the hope to break down barriers and open up communication. We often approach situations from a perspective of how it would be for us rather than how it is for the child or the partner. Even if we cannot understand things from their perspective, we can approach the relationships from a place of compassion and support. If we wish for our family and our children to flourish and grow, then we must tend to our own mental health. We must prioritize self-care and seek help when needed.

I spent time talking to teens and young adults about their journey with mental health or advice they would like to pass on. These are a few of the comments they would like to share below.

Self-love and self-validation are so important, and finally understanding this made a huge difference in my mental health journey. Instead of seeking love and validation from outside sources, I started to look within for love and validation. I started building that love and trust from the inside out. It may not be easy, but it is so worth it. Whenever I have the days where I feel like the current me doesn't deserve that love, forgiveness and trust etc I do it for my dream future or the little girl I once was, who just really needed a hug.

• Advocating for myself was necessary, to have people truly hear and listen to me. It is so important not to let people diminish your true feelings and to fight for the help you need. Always ask questions and do your own research. Mental health should be taken just as seriously as physical health, as they directly affect each other!

• I found that sharing my struggles in mental health removed barriers between my parents, siblings, as well as extended family. I find it so much easier to be open with my family when they too stop hiding their struggles. It creates a space of love and compassion, but most importantly understanding.

• The mind is like clay, and so powerful. You have the ability to make it a beautiful place, or the opposite. Though no beautiful garden is without a pest sometimes. Create beauty within and continue to recreate it every day.

• I think looking at myself as a whole needing care and nurture instead of fixing helped a lot. Eating, moving, talking, reflecting, surrounding myself with positive people, setting boundaries and getting support. I used to wish for a “magic pill” to fix it all when really, I wasn't eating, I wasn't exercising, I wasn't expressing myself, and I was filling up on various toxins. How will my body care for me, if I don't care for it?

• Looking at addiction as an illness instead of a choice helps the person experiencing it, as well as those close to the one experiencing it. It creates a space for compassion and empathy, instead of anger

• I think it has become so common that anger, sadness, etc are looked at as negative when really that just creates more and more of this emotion. It can create more suppression and make it more intense. Really is that those emotions need to be looked at as being human and learning how to create a loving space to experience these, and how to express them healthily to others.

• I like to remind myself that everything in the media is fake, or always the best parts of life. Also, to create my social media to work for me so following body acceptance accounts, ones that show the ups and downs, and people who inspire me.

• I find when the social anxiety kicks in, and I start to overthink the way I look or every action I have made I like to remind myself that I am so consumed by me and that everyone else is too …. No one could even have the mental space to worry about what I’m doing or looking like!

• Always remember one thing at a time, you cannot master a billion things at once, master one thing at a time, and get rid of that all-or-nothing mindset! Look at things as little molehills, never a big mountain to climb.

• I’m still working on finding the root cause of everything for myself, but the journey to the root cause helps, and the root cause is more important for me in healing before looking at the outcome.

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I chatted with youth ages 11 and up about being around friends and family with mental health challenges. Here is some input they wanted to share.

• Coming from a place of love, compassion and doing research really helps to have a good relationship with my loved ones who struggle continuously with mental health. To be educated on their struggles if possible is important, and to be kind.

• I found myself healing and helping “strangers” before healing myself or helping my family as it is more comfortable to help others than yourself or those close to you due to the stigma. Getting comfortable in the uncomfortable is key, and just healing yourself will ripple onto others.

• Don't expect youth to share their emotions, mistakes, and struggles if you hide yours.

• When my parents actually started healing themselves, it improved our relationship so much. I think expecting your kids to work on themselves without them doing it can be very frustrating.

• School is such a high source of mental health struggles, the pressure can be so much, from myself, from family, and from the teachers. I think learning techniques for stress would help a lot within schools.

• Social media can be so toxic, it puts a lot of pressure on how you look or how much money you have.

• It's important for adults to talk to us about their feelings, talk to us about how they deal with stress, to help us understand and remember how hard being a youth can be

• I have learned that being around people with mental health to try and put myself in their shoes, and not take things personally like when they act out due to addiction or anxiety. But also have boundaries and remove myself if it's affecting me in a bad way, and get help for myself as it can be hard to be around that.

• I feel that almost everyone I know struggles with mental health in one way or another.

• I like to be kind to anyone who is struggling, but it doesn't make it right for them to mistreat people or not be kind. So, I won’t surround myself with those types of people but always wish them to heal someday and become kind.

• Everyone's reality and experience are different, I have ADHD and my best friend has ADHD yet there are many differences as well as similarities.

• Be willing and open to getting support and help for your own mental health no matter what age you are

Small and simple steps can be put into place to ease mental health challenges. Not prioritizing wellness support is denying possibilities for ease, calm, joy and growth.

Please share this information with the youth in your family and reach out if you would like to talk about mental wellness for you and or your family.

It starts with one simple step."

Andrea Lines

Holistic Practitioner